Friends, Lovers or Nothing.

If your a JM fan then you'd probably already know I stole the tile directly off one of his new tracks on the new album "Battle Studies". Which I must say is quite different from his older records, but nonetheless another amazing display of inspiration, guitar and all things good. It is an album that you will "hate at first", but will "learn to love".

The statement isn't hard to understand, but it I couldn't agree more with it. So you see, sometimes we are stuck in the situation where we question whether to tell her (or him) that you "like" the person without knowing if they like you also. And when she replies with everything but "me too", it for most cases always mean "I don't". Then your stuck in a moment that is ridiculously awkward and should have been completely avoided. In that moment, it determines whether or not things shall progress as planned and we live happily ever after or it will simply be a permanent awkwardness destroying all the friendship that could have been.

But asides from the direct meaning I learnt something that to me seemed even more profound. How hard is it to find a your best friend? I mean sure we have lots of friends (from a general perspective), and finding a Lover will eventually come, but there is such a rarity of friends who you can truly hold dear to you in all situations. In the circumstance that this person should be of the opposite sex, it is even harder to find such a person. Because we are once again stuck in the situation of being "Friends, Lovers or Nothing".

People spend their whole lives looking for "the one", but I reckon we should spend our lives looking for "My Best Friend". Not completely avoiding finding her (or him), but putting that up there as something on the agenda. Because lovers fight, but my Best friend will always have my back. And if you have found that person let them know that you got their back, or if you haven't when you do find them. Well I think you'd know what to do.

"I like you" - Anonymous

Peter.

*Note: If you're wondering why I haven't been writing a lot, it is because I've been playing COD:MW2 with all my spare time. Oh yeah, I've finished highschool! Congratulations Class of "09"

True?

If I had a penny for everytime I heard the word "If" I swear I'd be a millionaire.

Sigh.

You can't make money off yourself can you?

Peter.

The Spirit.

Over the last week or so it has been an emotional roller coaster of just enjoying friendship and the company of each other as a year twelve cohort, till the final assembly where we officially bid our final farewells to the teachers and students of our college. It has been an odd and interesting week I must say. Though it doesn't feel any different you'd realise that the reality is, is that it is pretty much finished.

There was a speaker on closure day who talked to the class of 09 about living your life without saying "what if?". It is a pretty much self explanatory where we make sure we make the most of everything. But I for one know that this doesn't happen in most cases, talking from personal experience. Now to explain it all in a couple of sentences would just be showing off my misfortunes, but I suppose for everything I could of done, I remember at least I did this. And I hope that this gives a little bit of me gives you something you can remember.

I'm not entirely an emotional guy, and for this last week of school it was just as always the same. I'd find myself in the awkward position of being in the middle of a place where it seems that everyone seems to be sad and emotional besides me. It almost reminds me of my grade six graduation where once again everyone was crying except for me. The only difference is this time it literally is all over. Well memories are good, but well if it was only that then what is Facebook for.

Friends. I wonder what would have happened if we had never met them. Some say that we are a reflection of the people we hang around and because we meet so many people the combination creates a new personality that makes you well you. To imagine that if we had never met these people we could possibly be a very much different to who we are today. It is amazing to find so many things that we can thank our friends for. We thank them for being there for us in times of strife. We thank them for lending some lunch money when we forgot it at home. We thank them for helping us with our maths homework. And most of all we thank them for being our friends. Because without them we wouldn't be who we are.

I guess for me it will take a few weeks or even a couple of months to miss waking up at 7:30 every morning to prepare for school and having to give a new excuse to why I was late for class. Just maybe I might miss getting yelled at my teacher for someones else's miss doing or even buying stuff from the canteen. Well whatever happens life keeps going and in the end if we don't make the most of it, someone else will. So let that someone else always be you!

Good Luck Class of '09!

Doey.

The time has come, not really.

Quickly she hears the foot steps coming closer and the noise of the gates open wide again. Her face lightens up and she begins to have a jolt of excitement just hoping to get some attention. But he walks past her grabs his jumper and walks back closing the gate behind him, not even a glance.

If any of you people who read know me enough, you'd know that I have a dog by the name of Lucy. Back when I was a kid she use to have puppies quite a bit and I'd still remember playing with them even though I'd be allergic to them and get amazing reactions which left me scratching for ages. Over the years she had about eleven puppies, which were given away but never ended up giving away Lucy. She's the same age as me and still going strong.

I was doing the washing today and out of curiosity I decided to observe her for a moment. She was on her back rolling around in an attempt scratching it, which seemed quite self indulgent, and then she scurried over to the garden and dug around a bit just minding her own business. Then I remembered a time where she use to be the main attraction, the one whom use to catch everyones love and affection, but now nothing. Sad huh?

Sometimes we are like that, we just do what we do. We don't do anything wrong to annoy anyone and at the same time we just do what suits us best. If we do anything to flashy we get too much attention and that is just risky. So long as no one notices, its all good. But as much as we know as that isn't how it should be, it in the end is just easier. Ah the good old days. Well that what all the could've beens say.

Simply enough, it shouldn't be like that, although it does help when you have good friends.

"One, two " The preacher thought. He knew that there was definitely one more person, but didn't know who "Where is three?". Time went by and all he knew was that time had won this time but still he knew that there was one other out there who definitely needed to respond, maybe another person will get to this person. Only he will never have the satisfaction of knowing who that person was. The third person? Who knows? who cares.

"Aja! Aja! Fighting!" - Geum Jan Di

Peter.

The thief.

Relient K- There Was No Thief

For a time I thought there was a thief among us
I thought I'd track him down, but prior to my pursuit
The smoke it cleared, and to my disbelief
There was no thief 'cause it was me that lost you
There was no thief 'cause it was me that lost you

I guess it's safe to say you're never coming back
And I understand why you wouldn't want to
I guess it's up to me to find a way to get to you

And there's just one last thing that I have to say
As we reflect on the mess of all of this I've made
It was cowardice that made me push you away
I was so afraid 'cause you were so much better than me

I can't see you
Getting used to
Living in the midst of your perfection
But I'm so lost
How can you trust
Somewhere the sun is always shining

And there's just one last thing that I have to say
As we reflect on the mess of all of this I've made
It was cowardice that made me push you away
I was so afraid 'cause you were so much better than me

I guess it's safe to say you're never coming back

--

Because sometimes it's your fault that things happen.

"There was no thief 'cause it was me that lost you" - RK

Peter.

The Key.

The other day I sat in my psychology class and I'd come to realise that none of my psych mates were there. Well there were people but not the people who usually sit with me. So out of sheer I decide to write this story, but first before I'd like to bring up another small story that happened to me recently.

NOTE: This will probably be a long one.

---

So it was Thursday and I had just completed my third period. I then had my lunch and jumped on the bus for the excursion. Everything was all good and dandy as I learnt a little more about Universities, selection and all things boring. But as I left I realised something was missing. My wallet. So I retrace my steps but still could not find it so I concluded that it might be in my locker back at school. When I arrive at school I quickly walk down the hill, into the building and rush to my locker. But it's not there.

For the following days after I informed everyone about the deep and sad loss of my precious wallet, except for one person. The person who gave me the wallet. Though there was money, all my identification, my license and internet cafe membership cards in there, all I was worrying about was how to approach this person to tell them of the missing wallet. My irrational thoughts concluded that they would hate me forever once I had informed this person about it.

Eventually I drew the courage to tell this person and in the end this person didn't hate me and rather this person was more concerned with what was in the wallet as anyone else would. After this it made me realise two important things. One that a friendship isn't based on materialism and two that there are more important things to an item or person than their outside because what they hold inside is what really matters. Interesting really because it relays that the old saying that there is more to a book than its cover. Profound eh?

So anyway I was about to give up on the wallet and was about to cancle all my cards (actually I didn't because I was lazy haha) but then I received a phone call from a security guard that had picked it up. And that was the end of that dilemma. Oh I must also mention it was coincidentally right before this person was going to buy me a new one. How good is that?

---

So thats the first little story and here is the main event.

---

A present from his father excites the boy as he eagerly claims his prize. A key, one that had been passed down through their family history. It seemed insignificant to the young boy. He looked at the key from all different angles trying to find something of interest within the in-animant object, but all he saw was an old key with a little rust within the dented crevasses of the key. "Don't lose it" the father tells his son and with a quick reply the boy smiles and says "I won't". His father knew that he would lose it just as he had.

Years later the boy turns twelve years of age and is given another gift. A small wooden box. Though he had close to no interest with it he smiles and says "thank you". The father then tells the boy "There is a key to opening this box, but you must press on the heart to open it. Only when I am gone are you allowed to open it". The boy smiles again and says "Ok".

Time is not often a good friend of the elderly, as too realise that the reality of death is so close only makes life pass by so much faster. And that time had finally come for the father. The boy was boy was struck with an immediate sadness. Memories of his fathers love comforted him, but his mind only reminded him of the reality that his father was gone forever.

Among all the sadness the boy remembers the wooden box his father had given to him as a child. He picks it up and observes it from all angles and notices a small golden heart. He then realises that he had also received a key, but he cannot find it. He is immediately angered at his carelessness and grips the box with all intentions of destroying it. As his does this he puts his thumb over the heart and squeezes as hard as he can. *click* The box is open.

Shocked by what had happened he immediately remembered what his father had told him as a boy. "So that is what you meant Dad, haha" he says. Comforted he opens the box and finds a letter and another key. On the letter he reads:

" Dear ____,

It looks like you finally realised how to open the box. Remember this that at times you may try to find they key to every situation but more often than not you would have lost the way to go further, and when it seems as though you have no more answers press on your heart. Enjoy life.

From Dad

Ps- Pass this key down and replace it with another so that this lesson will always be with us. "

So life moved on and the boy one day became a father and he told his girl "Don't lose the key". She smiled and said "Yessir!". But he knew she would lose it. Cute isn't it?

---

I only expect two or three people to read up to this point and if you have thank you. And yes you finally read my lame story Chi :)

"When you can't trust your logic, follow your heart" - Chi Trinh

Peter.

Kick it with you.

It's ten past the eleventh hour of the day, only two hours left he thinks to himself. He glances across the room and observes finding the flashing lights of the router, the clock ticking its way and the clouds slowly passing over the horizon. After moments of day dreaming, he looks down and draws attention to the amazing technology all based within a simple pencil.

"Ah I am so bored, what to do?" he thinks to himself knowing that he is restricted to the very walls of the room until the supervisor announces that they could leave. He continues to look around drawing attention to every pointless detail within the confines of the room. Only an hour left until the dreaded boredom was over. But with knowing the time it often feels as though it goes slower, which is a pain.

So with the longest hour of his life he begins to ponder about thoughts which had been on his mind for a long while. Remembering the warm memories where by he was able to hitch a small smile for a second, but suddenly is saddened to why it ever came to this point.

Ten minutes left the boy finally realises that he had not even achieved anything within that practice paper. "Next time" he says to himself. The supervisor gives the final reminders to everyone and finally dismisses.

He thinks to himself as he leaves the class room, "Oh well yesterday was pretty good, but today never is, maybe tomorrow will be better". He thinks of her.


"I miss the old ____ " - Anonymous

Peter.